Free Bigfoot Books

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Okay, I didn’t mean that I’m giving away free Bigfoot books, so don’t get the wrong idea and start requesting them,  What I’m saying is that I’ve gotten a couple of them in the mail recently with the expectation that I’ll read them and provide glowing reviews of them.  But…before you get too jealous of my new reading opportunities, let me tell you that both of the books look homemade.  Completely homemade.  Like, when the authors finished writing them and glued the pages together, they pulled out a box of crayons to draw the covers all by themselves and struggled to stay within the lines.  I shouldn’t laugh, but…well…everybody needs a good laugh every now and then, don’t they?

I’ve been tempted to wander up into the mountain woods to see how ‘correct’ these books might be about our possibly imaginary furry neighbor, but…

1)  Its been really hot out lately

2)  Then it rained

3)  I haven’t actually read the books (and don’t really plan to)

So I settled for mowing the lawn and gazing longingly up into the hills and just let my imagination wander.  It’ll have to suffice for now.  And, as my mind wanders, I wonder what agents are thinking about the first chapter of my novel.  Yes…that’s my way of saying that I sent my query letter and the first chapter novel to agents to read and…well, my imagination bounces between them loving it and getting it published and hating it and laughing about it over drinks with roving gangs of other agents.  Ahh, vivid imaginations can be troubling sometimes…

Do you remember when you were a kid and sent in your allowance money to order some amazing plastic product that was announced on the back of a cereal box or shown in the back of a comic book?  And you were told to wait 6-8 weeks for it to arrive?  Time dragged on sooooooo slow…

Then, when you become an adult, time never goes that slowly again.  Heck, autumn – the greatest of the seasons – never seems to last longer than 36 hours once you’re an adult. But now that I’m forced to wait a couple of months to hear back from the agents I’ve reached out to, I’m a kid again.  But, instead of checking the mailbox 8 times a day, I’m checking my email every quarter hour.  I guess we never actually grow up.

And, when that first response comes in, I know that I’ll excitedly not open it for a few minutes, just in case it’s bad news.  Because, while I have confidence, what are the odds that the first person I send my manuscript to will be the one who becomes my all-time best friend for making my writing dream come true…  It just might be the second person instead.  Okay, maybe the 43rd.  But he or she is out there somewhere.

Searching for that elusive agent is like like looking for Bigfoot.  You need plenty ofpatience (and a bit of craziness).  And maybe a couple of tranquilizer darts…

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